The "phobic" suffix comes from the word "phobia", which is defined in psychological circles as an irrational fear of something. Hence, when you refer to someone as "homophobic" you infer that said person is somehow afraid of your sexual orientation. While I have no doubt that there are people who feel threatened by it, there are also many of us who disagree with your sexual preference without actually being afraid of it.
For the record, as a heterosexual male, I believe that all persons should be treated equally in all things regardless of sexual orientation. That said, I also believe that homosexuality is a mental abnormality. The brain is meant to be wired to prefer intimacy with members of the opposite sex. It's biologically necessary for the propagation of our species.
I don't believe homosexuality to be a matter of choice, any more than heterosexuality is. Therefore, I would never judge or condemn a homosexual person's sexual orientation, nor would I in any way discriminate against such a person, any more than I would condemn or discriminate against a bipolar person or someone with down syndrome or autism or depression. These people can't help being what they are but that doesn't change the fact that their conditions are abnormal. That is not meant to denigrate them in any way.
What I do object to is those members of the LGBTQ community who expect the rest of us to go beyond simply accepting them for who they are, and to actually applaud their sexual preference, or who would profess their sexual orientation as being normal. It is not. And I especially object to those of us who stop short of embracing their preference being referred to as homophobes. After all, I'm sure that they would balk at being called heterophobes.
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